Wednesday - "Sorry?...You need me to pick her up right now????"

26/4/2017

Vicky duckworth

26/4/2017 10:07:32 am

This is one that gives me the panics ... just looming and reading the words. As a working mum I have felt guilty and indeed attitudes of some co-workers and managers been made to feel guilty if my child was ill ... almist as thought it's an excuse for shirking work. So I tended not to share the situation at home, keeping my private and work life separate ... apart from colleagues who i connected with, colleagues who cared and I respected and importantly trusted.
There is so much I could write about this ... it is do difficult to briefly sum up tje emotional turmoil when your child is poorly and you are being plagued to hit work deadlines.
I would say that the support of others who listen and care helps so much ... i have a bery good friend who has been there for me. Often i did not want to put my anxiety onto my husband as he works full time and he needed to find the balane too.
Yes good friends kept me sane and being there for my family was vital.

Nic Griffiths

26/4/2017 10:13:35 am

NIGHTMARE!!!!! If I'm at work I can very rarely answer my phone never mind leave and go to school to pick them up!! This is when I have to rely heavily on their Dad or my sister, those both work too and I feel incredibly guilty!!! This is the scenario I dread and I feel selfish due to my choice in career and at times it has to come first!!

Kate

26/4/2017 10:31:21 am

I'm overwhelmed by aniexty at the thought of this. Admittedly, the majority of the time, I wouldn't be surprised by the phone call, as I had probably sent them to school knowing they weren't 100%. This causes stress at home as we decide who has to take the time off to look after our sick child (poor thing just wants to be at home and cuddled-yet we put work first). Thankfully, I have two healthy children who rarely need time off. Phew - seriously hoping I haven't cursed things here. Ha

Jane Tillier

26/4/2017 11:06:48 am

I once got that call JUST before taking a funeral at the Crematorium. (I'm a vicar for those who don't know me!) I jumped in the car after the service and drove to school and ran up the school path with cassock and surplice flying in the wind... It makes me smile now! I felt sick at the time... and 'bad' at everything!

Elaine Sumner link

26/4/2017 12:49:27 pm

This is my worst nightmare. The school calling to say one of the children is ill is bad enough but when the sports coach is on the phone I feel physically sick as it usually means a trip to A&E. I am very fortunate as I have a large family who are more than happy to help but they are not always available and I feel very guilty at taking up their precious time with my problems. I also feel very bad if I am not able to take care of the children myself particularly when the children were young and all they wanted was a hug from Mum.
At my first ever interview for a teaching post the Headteacher asked me what arrangements I had in place for when one of my children was taken ill. A question he should not have asked but which I had a very organised and efficient response to. I presented a very confident approach but was dying inside at the thought of it.
I am fortunate that the people I work with now are very supportive but it does not make me feel any less guilty for asking to be able to put my family first. I think this is the scenario that every working Mum dreads.

Anna

26/4/2017 03:27:04 pm

Although I used to dread this call, I was always very clear that it's family first. Unfortunately, being a teacher meant that invariably someone had to step in at the last minute and take my class so I felt guilt about this aspect of it. In some ways, this sort of call during the day troubled me less than kids being ill in the morning and having to phone school to say I wouldn't be in. Then I would have two lots of guilt! One about the fact that my class would need covering and the other about feeling guilty in the first place! Feeling guilty about feeling guilty! As I have got older, however, I feel I am better at saying: no, sorry, my kids come first. Full stop.

26/4/2017 07:22:57 pm

I am less worried about this the older I get. I think- this is my child and that is work- there isn't a competition, I go get my child. How can we be teachers and think otherwise really? I was pretty strict with my husband too- you share this thing if we have to take time off.
But saying that- always felt bad leaving my colleagues to pick things up- but it is reciprocal and we do it for each other.

marion evans

26/4/2017 08:40:02 pm

Work was always good when my daughter was ill and I needed to go and collect her from school. If Lucy needed to be at home Michael and I would share the load. One of us would work in the morning and the other in the afternoon or visa versa. If my mum could she would travel up to help.

Donna

26/4/2017 08:54:49 pm

I am lucky that so far, this hasn't happened to me, however I have had a few times when my child has been poorly and off school so I have had to cancel or rearrange things at work. Although my child's father could look after them (especially as he doesn't work) I want to be with them and nurture. So, I snuggle and stay at home. It is times like this when (unusually for me) I don't care what work thinks but it is when I return and try to pick up the tasks that I left, where things get difficult.

My guilt lies with leaving work for my child and having to rely on my colleagues knowing that I have made their work more challenging for that day. Yet, I don't think I would be able to let anyone else look after them when they are ill even though I know they will be great! I want to look after my baby when they are in need.

26/4/2017 11:16:55 pm

This strikes a chord with me ... this is where my guilt my is in and struggle withvthe work ..single mum ..no help fro. grandparents thing ... ive been made to feel guilty for putting my children first ... and also been made to feel guilty by the ex for putting work first ... it is a a struggle

Polly

27/4/2017 09:08:55 am

This was always a nightmare - thankfully it didn't happen often but with no family close by we had to rely a lot on friends if this ever happened. Despite my children being very much older now I still have the guilt of being about number four on the list of people to contact if they needed picking up!

Claire Stevens

28/4/2017 09:21:45 am

I've occasionally had to send a kid to nursery or school with a dose of Calpol in them and my fingers crossed! Thankfully, it happens less now they're older. My husband takes most caring responsibilities when we have decided to keep them off because it is easier for him to do so than me. He has been criticised by managers for taking the time to care for sick kids, to which he responded "you wouldn't have made those comments if I'd been female!"

1/5/2017 11:26:45 am

This dreaded call is every parents nightmare. I am guilty of having administered calpol and sent my little ones on their merry way, telling them that everything will be fine, only to receive that call.
Unfortunately there have been few occasions when I have been able to pick up my child and have found myself relain't upon friends and family in times like these. This also leads to pangs of guilt.

Wednesday - "Sorry?...You need me to pick her up right now????"

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